HELL YAH!!! We will go to the store!

Big pants asked me earlier, "I want to go to the grocery store." Okay, not really asking, but since he has never actually asked a question, I had to go with his intonation. This is how we know he is asking for something. He also asked three times. 

I jumped out of my seat, "What? You asked me for something outside of food and television?" What? You asked to go to a place outside of the zoo and swimming?"

HELL YAH!!! We will go to the store!

After my initial excitement over this novel request tamed, we got ready and headed out. After all, I always have a list. I'm a mom and that's my job :)  In my elated state I did head out in my slippers, but caught that in time and put on different shoes. We headed to Target, on a Saturday afternoon no less. This is what I would call a tiny little chunk of hell on any other Saturday, but today, sure, lets hit it! 

Quick backstory- we used to take the kiddos out to do errands on a regular basis, now we don't do it at all unless we have to. We don't get to spend a ton of time as a family so when we do we would prefer to go to the fore mentioned zoo and YMCA. When I am home alone I cannot take all three kiddos out alone due to safety, elopement and all that jazz. I am lucky enough to have time to shop on my own most of the time. 

I would first like to mention that this is a historical moment for us. Big pants doesn't ask for things outside of his basic wants and needs and once they are met he will not ask another. He doesn't wonder or make statements about things out loud. I am sure he thinks them, but he isn't a sharing kind of guy. So this request, which was paired with his happy dance after I said yes, was an unusual request. Take what you get when you get it, right? 

Well when we got there, I don't really think he knew what he had requested. He grabbed my arm and held on for dear life. He was agitated when we walked in and got our cart. I didn't even make time for my usual Starbucks before shopping. I had to ask him to use his words and tell me what he wanted. He just kept scripting something unknown even louder. I suggested we go look at the Easter candy first and he was sort of okay with that. It took a while, but he calmed slightly. In the meantime, I had a cart full of goodies and yes, I bought them! I had him push the cart and help me make some simple choices to keep him engaged. I had a short list and time to spare. We hit the toy aisle for a new puzzle and the movie aisle for a new DVD. On another note, that Elmo must be a rich guy. He has a DVD on EVERYTHING and I am pretty sure we own them all!

During this time I wondered to myself- why don't we do this more? I typically run errands by myself so when we do go out an about we can do fun stuff. Why can't Target be fun? I know I love it and spend plenty of time and money there. Just as I lost myself in this thought, I remembered why I hate taking him shopping. Waiting in the checkout line. Grrrr... I steered us to one and he pushed the cart the other direction so we kept looking at things. I thought this was a good sign. We came full circle back to the checking lanes and waited in the shortest line. I had my fingers crossed so tight that we would leave the store on a good note. He was loud and moving everywhere he shouldn't, but it was okay. I had him unload our cart and tried to engage him with some questions. He didn't answer me, but he was able to take the items out. I had to remind him to stay by me a million times, but he made it without a meltdown! WOO HOO! Time to celebrate! It is always easier to leave them home and when I have a $300 list I will go alone and get my coffee. On these random Saturdays when I forget a few things or if he ever asks again (I hope he does), it is important to NOT just do what is easy. After 9 years into autism we have gotten a little, dare I say, lazy with doing certain things. It is not okay for me to use the excuse, "it is just easier not to." Well I can use it, but not abuse it, right? 

We talk about teachable moments all the time. Today was a learning moment for mom. Slow down, step out of the easy and try it again. Shopping has been an epic fail in the past and chances are it will be again, but who cares about the stares and go for it!  It was a short trip, full of tons of vocal stimming, toe walking and general autism quirks, but it went well. I don't know if Big pants will ask again, but if he does I am jumping to my feet to hit the aisles again!